Posted by: La Coacha on Tuesday, February 16th, 2010 to Whore-o-Scope


Joo know what time it is? Aquario Time, Aquario, Aquario Time!

Aquarius is the sign of frenchip, not lub.  Frenchip is what makes them fall in lub. They are an air sign, in need of mind estimulations and intellectual games. They simply cannot be khappy or fulfilled unless they are free to do as they like. Gib this person constructive criticism, and they will hide from joo.

cameron diaz-and-justin timberlake

Aquarius is the most unpredictable sign of the sodiac, quite khard to get. He usually isn’t a follower when it comes to the rules of society, pero once his frens call him, forget about it! He will be their little beesh!

Justin Timberlake Tequila

He’s a free and curious espirit who balues his independence and always wants to learn about new chit. This man will drop eberything to help a fren, or eben a stranger! Unlike born-again attention khores (Brangelina), the Aquarian is actually born w/a humanitarian spirit (i.e. Oprah Winfrey, Ellen DeGeneres).

Did joo know Yustin Timberlake raised over $9 million dollars for the Chriners Hospital for Shildren in 2009 alone. He beat Madre Oprah and St. Brangelina!!! Gotta lub Yustin!

Justin Timberlake charity

Aquarians got a light and relaxing energy to them. (i.e. Taylor Lautner, Ashton Kootchy, Yon Trabolta). They are usually really sweet, pero once joo proboke them, the inner CHOLO comes out and daaaang that chit is scary (i.e. Christian Bale, Denise Rishards, Yennifer Aniston).


When joo are dating an Aquarius man joo must remember that he approashes the game of amor slowly y methodically. He always puts honesty ahead of romance. Highly intelligent, the Aquarius guy will see through any games that joo might play, so there is no point in even trying to play games. Joor also not going to impress him with physical flattery or fancy clothes. They Aquarius is so wacky, they need a fun espirit. 

justin-timberlake-funny-facebeyonce-justin timberlake-snl

An Aquarius’ most fun and compatible partner is, drumroll por favor…SAGITTARIUS! Sadly, it is usually the Sag that will break the Aquarian’s corazon. Cry me a riber =( 

Britney Spears, Justin TimberlakeJennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt

If joo are spending your time with him trying to be someone joor  not, he will see that as a lying game. Aquarians cannot forgib liars and he will be gone before joo get another shance, “The damage is done so I guess I’ll be leabing, Oh!”

If joo want to seduce Aquarius let him believe joo are his bess fren: don’t pooch him into anytheeng. He can’t handle it as well as a Pisces man. The best way to seduce an Aquarius man, other than not playing games and making sure not to tie him down too mosh, is to be a good communicator. Aquarians lub to talk and they will talk about ANYTEENG!

Ask only a couple of questions, and let them do ALL the talking and…crying. Then, joo will hab them “in the palm of joor khand.”  

5 Responses to “ Do’s and Don’ts of Seduction con un Aquarius! ”

  1. Nina, Love joor whoroscope better, think out of the box and member… joo have alot of  gays…grlz y byz that love joo! so mix the he she thing in.  Porque… u just detailed in the scope mi esposa! Lub joo… La Coacha…rooting 4 joo!

  2. Can you do how to seduce a libra?

  3. hilarious! and ooooh mi madre es un aquaria y mi padre sagitario, it didn’t work! he broke her heart she left him!

  4. COACHA! U have to do a Pisces man and let all the ladies out there know that we aint all macho, that we are sensible and need someone to take care of us!!! I love joo Coacha =]

  5. Coacha! when are you going to do Taurus baby????

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